Thursday, 3 January 2013

And it's hot, hot, hot

And why a picture of Federal MP Jenny Macklin on a hot summer's day? Simple - she raised the temperature of all Australia a couple of days ago. Now Victoria is on on maximum bushfire alert, Tasmania swelters, and the outback has temperatures up to 50C (120F). As to how...well, the chubby lady stood up in her designer clothes and said to the TV camera that she could live on Unemployment Benefit (though they only asked her to do it for a week). Now, she has well over $6000 a week income, while the unemployed take home around $240 a week. Undoubtedly she could do it for a week - her larder would be well-stocked, her government car would still be there, her home would be untouched. But if this lady (sic) who at present is the Disability Reform Minister in an ALP government (the equivalent of the US Democrats, supposedly), were to try to live on less than half a liveable amount (the $240) for, say, 18 months, she would find she couldn't run a car, rent a house, buy new clothes... even eat. And not only do the unemployed find it hard to exist legally, but they are also hassled by Centrelink as to how many jobs they have applied for each week - they are not allowed to visit relatives for a holiday, effectively being a kind of legislated prisoner.

Well, guess which coddled lady gained no votes at all for her party in the upcoming election?

So - to the general heat, apart from the hot-under-the collar variety? How can a fat old woman like me carry on around the place, walking dogs, feeding chooks (fowls), tending garden and goats? My solution is nicely simple and fits my feral image: whenever I have to leave my air conditioned house (oops - rather non-feral?), I either carry a bottle of ice clutched to my ample bosom or do the 'wet t-shirt' approach. This involves either walking into the shower fully clad, then walking out again and dripping cheerfully around the place, or wetting a t-shirt and struggling into it before leaving the house. Another approach I have found successful is to wet a beanie and pull it on my head before going outside, this being a literal version of 'keeping a cool head' - and also surprising the dogs by dripping over them.

Should there be a power cut during a hot spell, it then is time for the Wet Sheet approach. Once you are used to it, you can sleep well under a wet sheet, which keeps you nicely cool until it dries, when you wake up...

Enough! have a really good day and give politicians of all colours a really wide berth, whatever your weather!

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